Sidelined

For the last couple of days I've been sidelined by a killer stomach virus. Not killer in the sense that it actually kills people, or even in the sense that it was a comparatively BAD stomach virus...more in the sense that as you're crouched over the toilet at 4am you're thinking to yourself, "If God were to take me home right now I might not complain." So, you know, like all stomach viruses, I guess.

My husband...oh, my husband. Mark is my hero. He shifted into "get 'er done" mode and managed our also-throwing-up four-year-old all night, then cleared his schedule for the next day and took over the household so I could stay in bed and recover once the worst of the yuckiness subsided. (I think the hollow eyes and slurred speech scared him.) Someday I will have a day of leisure like that when my stomach doesn't feel like it has a rock in it, but for now, I'm very grateful for what I was given.

And, as it turns out, even a stomach virus has a silver lining! (Though that gave me an odd, tripe-like mental image...) I have a few things to report:

the scale--Two days of...well, you know...gave me a little boost in the "lose 100 pounds" department. The backward progress of Thanksgiving has been erased and a little further progress made, even now that I'm rehydrating! I'll take it.

a book--I can check one of my eight off the list: I read Eight Secrets to Highly Effective Parenting by Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, which was recommended by dear friends of ours. (Thanks, Dave and Cristi!) See, the vomiting four-year-old is a handful even when his dinner stays down. More than a handful, really. Dealing positively, consistently, and firmly with him has proved to be the biggest challenge of our 16 years of marriage. The others present big challenges, too, but Will's personality fits with and rubs against ours in ways that makes it less clear how to navigate the parenting labyrinth. He also brings out Mark's and my differences (which are myriad and profound), so we slip easily into conflict when we talk about how to approach him. This book, we were told, has a helpful and manageable approach to discipline. We were not misinformed.


I know this is a crappy photo, but this is all I could find online. I could go upstairs, find my copy, and scan the cover (which looks just like this) for a slightly less crappy photo, but my stomach is still a little wonky, so you'll have to deal with this one.

I really, really liked this book. Not so much for the quality of the writing, which is a little trite and tired, especially in the illustrative fiction sections. (Sorry, Dr. Turansky!) But its approach to discipline seems Godly and level-headed. It falls sort of in the middle between my style and Mark's, which is a good sign. If we're going to make something like this work, I need to have a tighter action point (the point where you stop threatening and actually act, says the book), and Mark needs to tone down the anger a little.

In fact there's a whole chapter on having a plan to deal with anger!! I'm thrilled. I've been asking for help with that for a long, long time, since Mark and I fall WAY on opposite sides of that spectrum, and neither of us is sure what to teach our kids about healthy anger management. I don't know whether this approach will work, but it's practical and detailed and at least SEEMS attainable, so hey, we'll give it a shot.

Oh, and get this. The last chapter culminates with step-by-step instructions for coming up with a character development plan for your kids! You're saying, "Hey, I think that's on her list!" And in fact you are correct. So, awesomely, I now have an instruction manual for that...you know, when I get to it. Don't rush me. I've been sick.

Anyway, the version of it I read is out of print, but you can still order it used from Amazon here. Or, according to my research, you can get the same content in their updated book, Home Improvement.

recipe #5--Chocolate Banana Muffins. I tried these this afternoon for my kids' snack after the nausea had subsided a lot. They were nice. Jack had been fussing with Will and came out to the kitchen, all weepy and drippy-nosed and looking generally cute and pathetic, trying to verbalize whatever heart-wrenching disappointment he was suffering, until he caught sight of these cooling on the stove. He stopped mid-word (I think), sniffed, hiccuped a little, and said, "Cuh-cake?"

I replied, "No, honey, they're...yes. Cupcake. Want a cupcake?"

He did. They were good.



Not over-chocolatey. No one over 2 will mistake them for a cupcake. Which is good, since this is my plan for breakfast tomorrow.

No recipe online, so here it is. Makes 12.

3 ripe bananas
1/2 c vegetable oil
2 eggs
1/2 c light brown sugar
1 1/2 c all-purpose flour
3 Tbsp unsweetened cocoa, sifted
1 tsp baking soda

1. Preheat oven to 400F and line a muffin pan with paper cups. Mash bananas by hand or with a mixer.
2. While still mashing, add the oil, then the eggs and sugar.
3. Mix the remaining ingredients together; beat gently into the banana mixture, then spoon into cups.
4. Bake 15-20 mins. Cool slightly in pan before removing to wire rack.

Still not back to 100%, so I'm sneaking off to bed. 'Night, all.